Mr. Right When You Need Him

So last Friday night I was getting ready to head to Tucson the following morning, and collecting "wish/needs lists" from CVE folk. I walked into the office to find Jenna typing on the computer.

"Hey Steph, I just sent you my list."
"Oh, cool."
"I only have three things... but I need all three things... all three things."
(Slightly bemused) "Okay."

Intrigued, I got home, checked my e-mail, and found Jenna's list... and the reason for her emphatic "... all three things." It read as follows:

1. sandals, size 5 for Eduardo, size 7 for Moises, size 8 for Timi (something to play in, not nice brown ones please)
[INSERT: I felt like a complete moron as I searched the little kids shoe aisle, surrounded by knowledgeable mothers and fathers buying their kids new sandals, and who didn't seem to see the need to spend 30 minutes deciding between "the cool blue ones with Spiderman" or "the practical blue ones - without Spiderman - that cost $7 less." Conclusion: I should wait on having kids of my own. And I didn't buy the Spidey sandals... even though I battled memories of wanting "cool" animated shoes when I was little... lol]

2. tshirts, size 12 mo, 24 mo, 2T, and 3T (probably most in 2T) if you find some, probably under $5, plain t-shirts with a pocket, or just plain tshirts...
[INSERT: Oh yeah... I remember... this is when the sales lady in the "Bebes" section asked me if I was having trouble finding sizes because I had only circled the t-shirt display twenty times trying to pick out the shirts I wanted - and incidentally that didn't have big, scary animals with fangs on them... honestly, who designs these things anyway??? - to which I politely replied that I worked in an orphanage and was just trying to find the right sizes in the right colors. And then I ran away and hid behind the Thomas the Tank pajamas. Conclusion: Maybe I should never have kids of my own.]

3. Slim (he's taller than me, blonde hair, green eyes, straw cowboy hat, stands up when a lady comes in, talks southern, and is a Man of God).
[INSERT: After deciding not to tackle and kidnap four or five men calmly walking through the Park Place mall that fit this description - I was searching diligently, I promise Jenna - I realized alternative means would have to be employed. Conclusion: I am, perhaps, the world's worst match-maker.]

Please bring everything on this list back to me. Please especially number 3. :)

And then signed, "love Jenna."

Well... as stated above, I had searched. And searched. None of the potential "Slim's" would fit well into the trunk of the car, might possibly have objected to my unorthodox methods of matrimonial persuasion, and - most importantly - were not exact matches for Jenna's specifications.

At the end of my rope, defeat looming nearer with each step, Jenna's potential tears splashing hotly across the pages of my imagination... I found her a man. Not Slim... admittedly. But I am hoping that he will do until Slim figures out what a catch she is... ;)

Meet... Mr. Right When You Need Him (tah-dah!)

Mr. RWYNH (a.k.a. Temporary Slim), practicing his first meeting with Jenna (in a southern drawl, of course)...

Temporary Slim has several advantages - #1 He doesn't talk except with love bubbles. #2 He always has something nice to say in these love bubbles. #3 He isn't real, so if you get annoyed having a man around you can set him on fire, and not go to jail... lol

His "heart bubbles" say things like, "As always, you're right," "It's not your fault, it's mine," "You look thin. Have you lost weight?" "I could listen to you talk all night," and "May I take you shoe shopping?" [Yes, these are a trifle... tedious and standard. But... it's the thought that counts, right???]

Temporary Slim only has one more question, Jenna... in case "real Slim" doesn't get around to asking anytime soon... what will you say?!?

Further updates will soon follow, dear readers... ;)